Jason Cordova's Website

This one time at Writer's Camp…

Over The Barrel

I seriously screwed up at the job, and now I’m paying for it.

It’s frightening when you think about it. You work hard, try to do the right thing and follow procedures, but a mistake (like, oh, losing one’s temper) can destroy all the hard work and good effort one has made up to that point. So then you’re bend over the barrel, one mistake away from a firing, and you are scared. You’re nervous when doing your job. You’re looking through procedures, wondering if you’re next mistake, minor it might be, is your last. It affects your attitude, your interaction with others, your entire life.

And yet… all you need to do is let it go, wash it away, and start the job anew with the mentality of “That was yesterday. I am here today, working to better tomorrow”.

Yes, it’s hard to carry that mentality. Our emotional psyche is designed to remember our failures more than our successes for a reason. Instinctively, from hunter/gatherer mentality to today’s business world, 10,000 years of survival has taught us this. We dwell on our mistakes because if we don’t the next time the massive wolf would eat you or your boss will get rid of you (thankfully, not like they got rid of Jimmy Hoffa. The business world is cutthroat, but not that damned cutthroat. Yet). The difference is major when looking at it from the outside in, but when you’re the one looking at it with the slavering jaws of the wolf still stuck in your mind, it’s nearly impossible to be impassioned by it.

Let it go. That was yesterday. I am here today, working to better tomorrow.

It’s cheesy as hell, I’ll admit it without reservation. All it needs is a kitten laying on a couch somewhere to make it to the office space. But sometimes cheesiness is just what we need.

Like now, for instance. I want cheesy bread.

Anyways, with my usual ADH-Oh Shiny! moment out of the way, how do you fight evolution? How do you fight 10,000 years of ingrained behavior? It’s hard to wash those genetics away. It’s almost impossible to erase that mentality of bemoaning your failures instead of focusing on your successes. You don’t need to tell everyone that you are a success. If they see you doing well, then they see your success. If they see your failures, then that’s what they see. Again, though, if you work in fear of others seeing you fail, then you’ll never succeed.

This is a little too philosophical for me. Ah well.

Back to your usual meandering Saturday.

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